A guy once jerked off to me in a library bathroom. I lost interest in sexting after that
Month: March 2015
Just another penis story
“I’m not qualified for Birthright.”
“Why?” I asked, indulging him, as our friends chatted on the other side of the bar.
He paused, looked me straight in the eye, and then replied in a serious and steady tone, “I’m not circumcised.”
ONE MONTH LATER
Google me.
happy st. patrick’s day
Why I’m fundamentally opposed to online dating
It reduces market supply of eligible bachelors, therefore reducing probability of cute, offline “how-we-met” stories and therefore, ruining love for all of society; also, since supply of those looking-for-love moves online, offline “meeting someone” becomes less common, those who hit on strangers in real life are reduced to weirdos, and manners for meeting someone new evade present society.
For more information, please see my ex-boyfriend’s roommate’s Huffington Post article.
An eye for an eye
I went on a date with a goye and felt so guilty I joined jswipe
Confession
I found three of my favorite bands by MySpace stalking my crush’s camp girlfriend.
That girl had great taste AND a great ass.